Her Strength
by Alternate Ego
Summary: She has to be strong for her people, even if she feels like she's about to break... Dark!fic


**Summary:** She had to be strong for her people, even if all she wanted to do was break.  
**Pairing:** Slight Sheppard/Weir  
**Rating:** R for... really disturbing  
**Warnings:** dark!fic, disturbing imagery, torture, mutilation, death of an OC, did I mention dark?  
**Word Count:** 800  
**A/N:** What happens when I read too much dark!fic...

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-Her Strength-

By Alter Ego

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When Elizabeth refuses to tell them, they cut out Lieutenant Myreson's tongue.

The strap him to a table and force his mouth open, and it doesn't matter that Elizabeth reasons, threatens, and then breaks down and begs – her pleas fall on deaf ears.

_Tell us how to get to Atlantis, _they demand, _and we'll stop. _

But she can't. Helplessly, she says no and squeezes her eyes shut tight at the sound of Myreson's agonized scream.

---

There is blood splattered on her shirt sleeve; Elizabeth stares at it blankly. Myreson is still strapped down to the table, five feet away; she can only think that it's strange how his blood managed to reach her from that distance. The lieutenant is whimpering wordlessly, crying out in little mewls of pain, staring at her with wide, glazed eyes that mirror her own horror.

The limp piece of flesh that previously served as his tongue lies on the operating table beside him.

She shudders but forces herself not to turn away. She will stay strong for her people.

They ask her again – _Give us the IDC for Atlantis_ – and again she says _No_.

---

This time, they take Myreson's eyes.

---

Eventually they put Elizabeth back in the cell with the lieutenant and Dr. Lily Layen. The doctor's shaking is barely discernible, her hand pressed firmly against her mouth as if to keep from crying out with Myreson.

Elizabeth takes Myreson's hand gently, leading him to the only cot. He follows her meekly, dazedly, and she knows he's lost too much blood. It's everywhere, on the floor, his clothes, her hands.

He doesn't last the night.

She stays with him until the end, keeping his head in her lap as she strokes his blood-crusted hair and murmurs soothing nothings into his ear. She ignores his deformed face, suppressing her own revulsion at the two empty sockets and soundless mouth.

She needs to stay strong for her people.

There's no way to save him – it's a miracle he didn't die from choking on his own blood in the first place. Elizabeth strokes his hair and cheek, planning to lie and tell him that their people are coming for them and he'll be all right – but then he lifts his hand, a lost, blind gesture seeking a last modicum of comfort – she takes it in hers, and knows she can't lie.

She tells Myreson that she'll visit his family personally rather than just send the usual condolences letter. It sets him at ease, if the way his breathing evens out just before his heart stops beating is anything to go by.

---

When Elizabeth finally releases Myreson's hand, his fingers are already cold and stiff. She turns to find that Dr. Layen is still standing in the same spot, knuckles white as her fist presses against her mouth.

---

They come for Elizabeth and Layen in the morning, two guards who plan to take them back to the interrogation chamber. Elizabeth has no intention of letting them.

It shouldn't be so satisfying, to sink one guards own knife into his gut, to slice the other's throat as Layen holds him from behind; but it is, and something raging and dark that lies deep in Elizabeth's gut roars its approval.

---

Elizabeth and Layen escape and make it to the Stargate in the space of twenty minutes; Elizabeth doesn't dial Atlantis because they took her radio and DHD. Instead she takes them to the first planet that comes to mind – old Athos.

They stumble through the gate onto the quiet planet, and for several minutes, do nothing but pant for air. Then Layen asks, _What do we do now?_ and Elizabeth hesitates, because she's not really sure and Layen is crying into her jacket, sobbing like they've just seen one of their own tortured to death - and they have. Elizabeth holds her, strokes a hand up and down her back and resists the urge to break into tears herself.

She must stay strong for her people.

---

They dial the Alpha Site and go home. John's the first one to meet her, rushing down the steps of Atlantis with concern in his eyes, asking_Are you all right?_ and_Are you hurt?_

She wants nothing more than to sink into his arms and never come out of his protective embrace, to sob and weep for relief, to rage and rail against the horrors she's just seen. But her people are watching.

She has to stay strong for her people.

---

And if Elizabeth comes to John's bed that night, crawls in between the sheets and cries for hours into his chest, finally falling asleep to the sound of his voice as he murmurs a mantra of _Shh, it's okay, everything is going to be alright –_ no one is any the wiser.

-End-


End file.
